The only thing worse than a guy that can’t kiss is a guy who gives a lousy blow job. I mean we are gay men. We suck dick better than women, right. Straight guys have known this for eons. So there’s no excuse for a guy who can’t give a proper cocksucking. That’s why they call us cocksuckers, after all. We love to suck cock.

Top or bottom it shouldn’t matter if it’s ingrained in us or, at least it should be. I met this guy who was dying to suck me off, so I agreed. It felt like a limp fish touching my penis. His mouth was all slimy and then I felt his teeth on my delicate dick. And he’s really into it, he’s not noticing I’m about to wish for a root canal, than have his untalented mouth on my very hot boy cock. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, when he asked me if it was good.

So next time he called me, I just said, you’re not my type. I felt bad for him, really because being gay, and not being able to give a good blow job, he might as well learn to like girls.